Dear Joy

Dear Joy Isi Bewaji: I hear You are a mean bitch

Dear News Maker, Ediale's Envelopes

Never seen a better-looking set of teeth.

I hear you are a mean bitch.

But as I stumbled on your live video.

All Ediale sees is a sweet face of some fine skin, blessed with teeth to die for.

But as I listen to your talk session, I understood where you got the inglorious title from.

I know people. I must possibly have known you without knowing you. Must have read about you.

Or attended an event you featured. Or seen a product bearing your name. Okay as I write this letter I remember where I first saw your name — Genevieve Magazine!

You were Managing Editor of the mag at some point in your career.

I was a fan of that Genny Mag.

I was a collector.

And a consumer of its contents.

Although it was a mag for and about women, I just couldn’t stop buying that mag for keeps.

Prior to inking this letter, I remember some few readers have had to tag you to some of my letters.

One time I cared too much to explain some opinion of mine to readers. A commenter said, “be like Joy Isi Bewaji, she just drops her thoughts and cares not what her readers think or not”.

Yeah. I remember that.

I like you already though.

We share similar thoughts on how we see religion and marriage.

We both engage in social affairs activism too.

And I subscribe to your ideas of feminism.

I have a daughter, Andrea.

With the way some men are wired.

And when I say some. I don’t even suggest a small percentage of us.

With the way these men are wired.

We all should pray our girls think like you.

Basically, what you are teaching women is to stand their grounds against any man that doesn’t value them, “specifically narrating why their marital vows should not be of a higher priority than their safety and happiness”.

I subscribe to this.

Little wonders some of my readers think you are some god. They idolized you when I asked recently of their opinions about you.

I understand not everyone calls you sweet. Some people def think you are bitter. But then, we have learnt that we can’t be loved by all.

And so long you still depend on Oxygen emitted from the African trees. There’s quite little you can do about displeasures and hatred exhibited by some men. Some women will also hate too.

Congratulations on your book success story.

10k reads.

For the book, ‘You Mad? Bake Cake’.

Well, keep being you.

Keep being a super single mother.

Letting people know that it is okay to have a life. A good life, even when that life doesn’t accommodate a man.

Even most men these days want women who are strong, and self-sufficient.

The only problem still remains ‘submission’.

Nigerian or African men are not willing to encourage that disrespect that takes submission out of marriage.

But things are changing.

The shift is happening.

Some men are becoming the submissive ones.

The numbers are growing. Not rising, growing.

Women are seeing good reasons to patronize bottles, special packages, and any product that can reduce men to submissiveness.

Now men are willing to have that conversation.

It’s overdue. But not too late.

How do we make sure our women are redirected to the place of honor?

And no. The place of honor is not that place of honor defined by abuse of her rights or reduction of such rights as it relates to that of the men.

What does equality mean?

Certainly, it doesn’t mean a man getting pregnant.

But in 50 years to come, men will bear and carry their babies for 9 months.

If scientific advancement doesn’t birth such trends, these emerging special voodoos will.

But as one of your book titles say, las’ las’ we will be alright.

Your Teeth spotter,

PS: This is a love letter.

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