Dear Tacha: you went, you annoyed, you came out

Dear News Maker

Dear Tacha,


This should have been ‘Dear Mercy’. And the second line of the letter should have been ‘Mercy, na man you be o’.
And that would have been paying her the almost deserved tribute. For doing what men couldn’t do – kicking your ass out!
But…


Mercy too should have been ejected!!!
I guess Biggie pitied her.
Seeing the way she started crying like a baby whose mother is embarking on a journey of no-return.
Funny.


She quivered, sobbed, and was almost going to be killed by the fear of disqualification. Immediately Biggie disqualified you and turned to her, all the bones in her body cracked.
She didn’t want to hear those Biggie’s lines…
And Biggie had a rethought.


He must have considered a lot of things. And one of such considerations must have been the cost of the ass job behind Mercy.
I understand though.
A girl that gathered all savings to do her bum-bum just for a show definitely wants to see the last day of the show.
At least.


So she cried blood.
And Biggie pitied a soul.
I bet she pissed on herself crying.
Well…


Thank heavens, her ass did not deflate from all the pressure.
She is also a snake. I don’t like her either. She must not win the N60m ( it’s Omashola’s money).
Enough about the girl with the fake ass. Back to you.

What’s next?


You didn’t see the 99th day you bragged about.
“No leave, no transfer”
So you chorused.
“I brekete for ground”
So you bragged.
Well, the lesson is obvious.
Or lessons.
So what’s next?


Peter (of PSquare), aka Mr P, said he was going to give you the N60M if you didn’t win in.
But… I heard he is trying to deny.
And that’s not surprising to me.
One, it was Peter who denied Jesus three times. Who is Tacha that the modern day Peter won’t deny?
Two, N60m giveaway is quite huge for an upcoming artiste (PSquare is not Mr P).
You said you will be bigger than biggie if you were to be evicted! We are waiting.
You’ve been having fun saying all sort of things in the house and behaving in terrible manners.
Welcome to the real world.
Where brands won’t associate with negative vibes.


And unless you do some serious damage control and image cleaning. It’ll be career suicidal for you to come out depending on endorsement deals.
‘cos quite frankly, trolling you and such brands would be the easiest thing to do. And trust the netizens and social bullies. They are waiting to launch at the brands and campaigns.


So be strategic when you come out. Don’t go near any endorsement that has to do with deodorants or perfume or mouth watch.
You will thank me later.


I am sure will get money. Just open a big beauty parlor and resign to it.
What did you achieve in the house?
You just went to a national airing to broadcast a troublesome image:


You went.
You annoyed.
You came out.


Anyways, at least you went.
And now you are back to the ultimate reality.
Welcome to the REAL NAIJA.
Buhari is still the P.


And talking about P, Mr P may not appreciate your early eviction. He is busy planning the logistics involved in the release of his new jam.
And we pray the jam jams. So don’t be offended if he doesn’t answer your calls.

And if you are too ashamed to face the media after your braggadocious proclivities. Well, you may put up for the Venice challenge. One man wants to take a married woman to Venice for a romantic vacation. I know you are unmarried, but hey, you just left Big Brother House. I am sure the man will bend some rules for you.


Your Venice Trip spotter,

Ediale
#ForTheCulture
PS: I love you (I am happy you didn’t get to the final. I love you for saving me the aches). Seriously, If you didn’t overdo you, we won’t be here writing you a letter about your awesome disqualification. And you won’t be there planning to attend Lords Of The Ribs.

PS2: You getting out of the show is symbolical. That you are out on the same day a Cindy, who we really know isn’t that strong a character, is out speaks volumes. And hey, Elo and Diane would breathe well now.

2 comments

  • Mercy was provocative, tacha raised her hand which is against the big brothers rules, they both knew this rule, yet tacha fell for mercy’s trap, one more weak was all Sha had, she could have held on just a little longer.

    Personally I wish Mike, omashola or frodd wins. All the best to the luckiest housemates.

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