Dear Janet,

The best thing in the world is the shedding of tears. Nothing is better than weeping. Crying is a gift. The creator of all is a wise God. He hides the rare gifts of life in places we never know. 

He hides tears in the eyes of babies, lots of tears. Ever wonder why people grow and they no longer have the ability to cry? In the name of being a tough guy, men can no longer shed tears.

I bless the tears in my eyes right now. This joy. This graceful bliss of affection can not be described. I am inside the rains. Just behind the Cold Stone store. Where I found you. 

I am standing here with my media friend. Drenched by the downpour and delighted by the reason I cry. Two heavens cry at the moment. As I shed tears, the clouds put perfection to it by also crying.

Why do I cry? 

How on earth did I find you? That’s why I cry. 

I do not like ice cream. I rarely even eat out. On that one glorious day of the 40 years of my life, I did the most important thing of my adult life. I took the afternoon off to cry.

That day was my mother’s remembrance day. I got to work and things erupted inside of me. I just felt different. I was down. I missed my mum who had died 15 years ago. And I just switched off.

The GM saw me and something directed him to give me a 30 mins break. He said, ” Hey, go to where they sell the coldest thing — aside from alcohol — in this city and sit under the A/C” he handed me some cash and I just responded. Uncharacteristic of me to take direct instruction from my boss on a matter that is personal.

Uncharacteristic of the General Manager to give anyone money that wasn’t tied to the salary. I moved. I got to where they sell the coldest stuff in the city. I sat. I cried. I cried for what my mum was missing in my life. 

She has always wondered how I will look when I was 40. He said I looked so much like my dad. Dad died when I was 17. Mum knew my dad with a potbelly. I was slim. Mum said at 40 I will look just like her husband. That the only thing missing was the big head and the big belly.

I cry because I now look just like dad. My head and tummy — maybe because I work in a brewery company and I also always eat at home — got pumped up. Mum was my heroine. She cried for dad all the remaining days of her life. Now I understand why.

She never remarried and that was not an excuse for her to allow us fed for ourselves. She worked her bones out. She did every kind of job. So long it was a job that would fetch her money for our foods and upkeep. 

We finished what dad started. We, me and my two siblings finished our schools and graduated thanks to mum. But a sickness had no respect for love and compassion. A sickness took mum and she left. 

Not that she wanted to go. She just had to go when the pains where unbearable. I couldn’t do anything. Couldn’t take her pain. I lacked the ability. I was not capable of helping her with this, one time that she was helpless. 

And so she exited. She took her leave. The day she left this world, I couldn’t cry. I wanted to cry. But I fainted.


Oh, life and death.

So this day I was at Cold Stone to just cry. And I was doing a fine job crying in true pain until you came to take my orders.

You touched the centre of my back. And my life paused. Only mum ever found the centre of my back. I was always slim. But mum was the only one that beat me at the very centre of my back when I did something wrong. She also touched me in that same spot when she wants to pet me to do something for her.

And you came and touched me at that spot. What followed just broke me into million pieces and refigured me at the same time. You heard me crying and you said, “We can all cry together after you tell me why”. 

That’s how you came into my life. You became my mum. You also became my best friend. You are an angel. You are perfect for me, its very easy to love you. It’s easy to love you because you are blind. 

I couldn’t help my first mum’s ailment. But I can help you. I will be your eyes. I will guild you through this earth. And if need be, to pluto, Mars and back. I am here for you until we are old. Baby, the good thing is, my eyes will never grow old. It will serve the two of us. 

I love you. Not just for allowing me to be your eyes. For also being my strength. I am sure my belly will never go back to being flat. You are a great cook. You defeated your blindness long before I found you. You became a value to this world. By becoming the best cook and baker you can be. 

It’s pure magic how you can make Afang soup the exact way my mum made them. You are not a liability, you are an asset. 

Today I cry in joy. Tears of joy. That’s what they call this.

Yesterday was glorious. You looked like icecream in your wedding dress. I am a lucky man.

Happy Married Life to us.

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